Well its December 27, 2009 and as I sit in the quietness of my space I began reflecting on the year and all the amazing adventures that Ive gone on in my endeavor to achieve the goals I set for Blac Gurlz Ink.
Spring Opara, Owner Blac Gurlz Ink Greeting Cards & Gifts
From day one the support has been simply amazing as family, friends and strangers came on board to assist in propelling Blac Gurlz Ink through…again…an amazing year! And to them I offer up my most heart felt “THANK YOU”. Without their support, the achievements made would not have been possible and for this I know that I am blessed.
One of my dearest friends mentioned to me that considering the year, being grateful/thankful is all that I can be and with that said I wanted to blog about Blac Gurlz Ink’s 2009 Achievements so that all involved can see what they contributed to in the course of helping to bring this dream to fruition.
So without further ado…
Blac Gurlz Ink’s Year in Review
*Starting and operating our first year during one of the most challenging economic meltdowns since the Great Depression
*Participation in the Make Mine a Million $ Business Race (M3Race)
*Second series greeting cards, Graffiti Queers completed
The Blac Gurlz Ink Babes - Graffiti Queers Photo Shoot!
*Enrollment and completion in the Women’s Initiative Simple Steps to Success Business Intensive (Mar-Jun)
*Enrollment with the BBB
*Free Trip to New York to attend the M3Race, The First 100 Day – a symposium for the Women Business Owners
*San Francisco Pride 2009
*Monterey Pride 2009
*San Francisco Intl Gift Fair
*Butch Voices Conference – Oakland
*Sistahs Steppin Pride – East Bay Dyke March & Festival
*Castro Street Fair 2009.
Paddington Station - London
*Free trip to London to promote Blac Gurlz Ink to overseas markets via winning a contest sponsored by StartUpNation and British Airways.
*Eclipse Holiday Event
That is quite a bit of work for any business in its first year. I am so happy in this moment and in the safety of my quietness I plan our continue…
TAKE OVER OF THE WORLD…haha! One greeting card at a time.
To all of you I send peace, prosperity and love in the coming year and I hope that you are all as excited about 2010 as I am. Cant wait to see what the Universe has in store for me…woohoo! Im so ready for it…see you all next year!!
So Vimal Weerawansha (who has president’s something in his mouth) has accused General Sarath Fonseka of being homosexual. Sarath had sex with many young soldiers, he says. It seems that these days, everybody’s accusing everybody of being gay. Ranil and Mangala are traditional victims of this. I heard somebody saying Mahinda was raped the one time he was incarcerated. Besides, homosexuality and masturbation seems to be the favourite topics on Sri Lankan political stage (I wonder what must be the ladies thinking). Frankly, I don’t give a rat’s fart about who’s gay and who’s not (I care a lot about who’s lesbian and who’s not though). But people must know who they are attacking before attackin. We all know that the only problem the goverment has with Sarath, is his entering into politics. So they should be careful. A lot of soldier families still loves him and I don’t think they would love to hear that he had sex with young soldiers.
My name is Michael and I am a 23-year old gay male that was diagnosed with severe ulcerative colitis in February 2008. I lived with the disease for almost a year, before finally deciding to have surgery in December 2008. I documented my journey on another blog, jpouch.net. You can read my stories on the following links:
I started out using that blog and it was a GREAT resource for people living with the disease and contemplating surgery. I got a lot of information, because I was able to talk with people that had lived with it, and also had surgery with a multitude of results. It also let you know what to expect before and after, which can get rid of a lot of confusion. The only thing that still confused me, was that I am gay and was looking to see how it affected gay individuals. I searched the internet up and down, only to find minimal results. I did get through to someone on jpouch.net, and he helped me answer a lot of questions, but there were still so many I had.
Since posting my story on jpouch.net, I’ve had many other gay people (more than I thought) contact me, or comment on my stories saying how it was such a relief to find someone else gay and going through this disease. That inspired me to start my own blog on being gay living with digestive diseases, or living post-surgery. It is a totally different perspective for gay people (gay men mostly), because we don’t just use our intestines for digestive purposes. It can be a dramatic lifestyle change, and I know that was the NUMBER ONE issue for me when I was sick. I had a partner for over two years when I got sick and it put a serious strain our relationship, and lead to the end of it. It was also hard for my family to understand where I was coming from, so I hope this site can be a support for family members as well.
I have done much research on this topic, as to what to do before and after surgery, what kind of sexual practices can you do, how do you psychologically face living with a disease that makes you feel immensely unattractive. So I ask that you use this site to get answers from me or other people who have been through similar situations. I would also like to post polls to see how people are affected by certain issues. This is a totally open topic blog, and you may ask anything you like, we are not discriminate, and there can be no topic too taboo. You may also be anonymous if you like. If you want to speak with me personally and identify yourself to get my perspective, you can e-mail me at Booties4986@aol.com. I will help you out to the best of knowledge, and if I can’t provide an answer, I will find one for you.
This is an issue we need to bring into the light, and I ask for your help! All members of the LGBT, heterosexual, or curious community are welcome to visit and post, I hold no discriminations and believe we are all here to make our lives healthier and happier. Let the fun begin!!!
former front(wo)man for “the organ” and all around musical dynamo. have you heard her sing? well if you haven’t I recommend you go to youtube this instant and thoroughly stalk her old band. if you already partake in this activity, good for you. me too.
the video below is not anything to see her sing, but she’s in it…in little shorts..so watch it, dammit!
ok, I’m done…for now. here’s a couple more to ogle.
The Tampa International Gay and Lesbian Film Festival has been in town these past two weeks, and it’s a time of celebration. We should not only be celebrating the films themselves, but celebrating the love that goes into the making of them. These are real people with real lives. This is someone, somewhere’s story.
There was also the National Equality March in Washington D.C. last weekend. Tens of thousands of gay and straight people from around the nation came together in unity to stand up for something important: basic human rights. Lady Gaga made a speech about the nature of equality, pointing out that “it’s not equality if it’s sometimes.” Cleve Jones, co-chairman of the march said “there’s no such thing as a fraction of equality.” It made me think about how far we’ve all come without really going anywhere.
Most people, at this point, understand what is meant by “tolerance.” As I’ve said before, this word is a crock of shit to me. So what? Joe Republican from Midwest, USA with his 2.3 children – that’s his son Timmy, his daughter Sally, and his limbless torso of a child Bob – doesn’t openly call the effeminate Starbucks barista “faggot” to his face? Is that tolerance? Or maybe it’s bigger than that. A woman can dedicate her life to her country by fighting in the military and that’s praiseworthy, but if she kisses her girlfriend when she comes home from overseas she will lose her job. Is that tolerance? I say fuck tolerance. Tolerance isn’t good enough. What we need is equality.
“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal.” This idea is supposed to be the foundation of our nation. Instead, it should read, “…all men are created equal – if you’re rich, white, and heterosexual.” I love those people that oppose gay marriage because “it ruins the sanctity of the union.” Right. Because Britney’s two-day marriage to her high school boyfriend is really the epitome of traditional family values. I don’t care about you and your husband having your bi-monthly missionary sex, that’s your business. Frankly,truestory. I’m just happy you’re gettin’ some. Why can’t you be happy for me too?
In the end, it should be about love. It should be about compassion. It should be about the collective effort to promote a greater good. “God created Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve.” First of all, everyone knows Steve was hooking up with Moses when he and Jesus had their falling out. And secondly, the foundation of all Christian sects is supposed to be about one thing: agape. That’s UNconditional love.
October 16, 2009
[To see the blog at Creative Loafing, click here.]
“You think Dragon and Star are cocooning, or should we invite them?” asked Boi and Ash flipped her wristfeed up to message her – no reply. They ordered pasta with a reddish sort of a sauce – that was about the clearest you could describe it too. It was sort of red and it was pretty cheap. As the light vanished outside and intensified inside, the bar grew fuller and the noise level rose gently. Sanjeev and Lori began to add a little rhythm to their bartending as the crowd swelled slowly; smiles widened and somebody put some electro-folk on the jukebox.
Star walked in, sans Dragon and plus a small posse, nodded toward their table and then moved off towards the bar. “Isn’t that …” said Ash, “… Nila.” answered Skin. Nila Moon, Star’s girlfriend before Dragon. They’d lived together for a few years, the break up had been acrimonious and Boi had almost caused the band to split by sleeping with Nila a bit soon after all the shit went down.
Cigarettes and alcohol danced on their own wavelengths, full things becoming empty, empty things being moved away to be substituted by more full things and everything circled by smoky blue trails. Jackets migrated to chair backs and hooks and the music developed muscles. At some point, somebody headed for the dance floor and of course other people followed; another Saturday night jol had officially emerged to slice through the weekend.
There was still no sign of Dragon and Skin began to fret slightly, because there wasn’t any reply to Boi’s message either. “She’s in the District, man,” said Ash and the others nodded. “Well I’m not up for a jol tonight anyway,” said Skin, “I’ll make a turn there and check it out.” She left Charmageddon on foot – downtown dockside, everything was in easy reach and the rain had disappeared.
There weren’t any lights showing at Dragon’s place, but Skin hit the buzzer anyway – there was no response. Only one thing for it – try the District. Back in her own home, Skin jacked in.
If dockside wasn’t big enough for you, the District was more than big enough for anyone – it wasn’t actually limitless, but it felt that way. Skin spawned in the landing zone; she didn’t have her own place there, but she knew how to access Dragon’s. A few commands and she was outside the door of Dragon’s home-from-home in cyberspace.
You tended never to look skywards in the District, because all there ever was, was a panoramic, edgeless and never ending Sistine style screening of the film, District 9. There were people, of course, whose sole purpose seemed to be to do just that – sprawl out horizontally, watching the film at different angles and in different abstractions and then they’d get very tense and intellectual about it all. Or they’d just take a lot of drugs and trip completely.
That was the end of the film reference, however; the rest of the District was covertly all about urban decay, but overtly all about whatever anybody wanted. In Dragon’s case, that seemed to be some sort of surrealler than life hybrid of Gaudi and MC Escher’s love child. And the interior was as optical delusioned as the exterior. On and offline, Skin’s left hand raised, palm out to signal her access pass to the entrance mechanism. Her experience prompted her to stand well back as the drawbridge swung open.
We have been conditioned to do whatever we can to hold on to what we already have while adding to it. This is most obvious in our consumption: I have more than I need to live comfortably, but I can add to that and make things even “better”. We are only willing to let go of something if we have improved upon it (replacing out old beater car with a nice new one), or if it becomes useless (a broken TV serves no purpose anymore so it goes to the garbage). It’s the same with relationships. We don’t want to let go of a friendship or relationship unless we have no more use for it. (Which sounds pretty harsh, but I think it’s true).
This is what I’m struggling with right now. I have a lot of good relationships- people at church, friends, and family. I don’t want to do something to negatively affect these relationships. I don’t want to lose them. But the truth is, sometimes in order to move forward we have to be willing to let go. In order for me to move forward as a gay Christian I have to be willing to let go of these relationships. I might lose some, some might change, and some may remain the same, but until I am willing to let them go, I cannot move forward.
But it is so ingrained in me that these things should be held to as much as possible that the thought of probably losing my church home, of having to accept a new type of relationship with my friends, of facing rejection by my family seems like too great a cost to pay to be honest about who I am. But God can’t continue the work he is doing in me until I am willing to let go of the things I cling to.
God won’t force his way in, so I have to let go to make room for him to work. And that means being honest and facing the consequences, whatever the cost.
One of the great things about Brighton and Hove is the comfortable way different communities can live alongside each other. There is little strife between communities, and this is something that we should cherished and protect.
St James Street has long been identified as an area with a high concentration of facilities for lesbian women and gay men, and many from the LGBT communities choose to live in the area adjacent to the Kemptown seafront.
Recently there have been calls to have the area designated as they Gay Village of Brighton. A community at ease with itself and with others does not require such a designation. It would set a precedent that many have resisted over many years. I recall the National Front trying to label the Palmeira Square area as the “Jewish neighbourhood” in Hove. While no direct comparison would be appropriate, it does allow others with divisive and dangerous tendencies to scapegoat and target its residents.
And by designating an area for one particular section of our community, there is the unintended consequence of excluding others who have long had it as their home or those who wish to make it their home.
I want to see the whole of Brighton and Hove being the area where lesbian women and gay men feel at home, where they may feel safe and secure, and where they and their neighbours can enjoy the distinct qualities of the diverse communities who enrich this City.
I watched Aliens last night. You know the kinda shoddy 1986 movie?
Well, I admit I usually give up on these movies within the first half an hour, but last night I decided to sit right through it, and it was only for one character.
Private Vasquez. Fucking oath.
Now I know it’s just a character, but can I have one? Please?
Now if you’ve never seen the movie I’m not going to describe the plot, so let’s all just pretend we’ve seen the movie shall we?
Private Vasquez is the quick-tongued, gun-ho Marine who gets part of one of the best quotes:
Hudson: Hey Vasquez, have you ever been mistaken for a man?
Vasquez: No… Have you?
So, I’ve developed a little infatuation, but I think I’m entitled to. And I don’t know many who would argue otherwise.
And that is my confession. I sat through two hours of some bad special effects and sometimes horrid acting just for one character. Oh well, I still can’t think of anything better I could have been doing.
So for those of you who have not heard, I’ve relocated to Hayward, CA in the East Bay. I had a great promotional opportunity come my way with FedEx Office and I just had to take it. In this still-troubled economy, jobs are hard to come by and significant pay bumps are even more scarce. For those of you who know me, you know that this is something I have been contemplating for a few years now. I’ve been waiting for the right opportunity to come my way and it did. Please don’t feel bad or hurt if you are hearing or reading about this for the first time. It all came about in a matter of two weeks (from the time I applied to the official offer) and by the time I had three interviews and accepted the position I was off to the races. Between packing and moving, searching for a place to live, taking care of INTEGRATION at Starline and Queer Networks, and oh yeah, Thanksgiving…it all just happened so incredibly fast. Obviously, I have friends, family, and Queer Fresno that will bring David and I back regularly, but I’m an East Bay Queer now and I have to tell you I’m pretty stoked. Wish me luck on my new journey and log on here for some of my excellent adventures.
California is set to elect the first openly gay leader of a legislature in the United States.
By Trudy Ring, The Advocate
The California state assembly’s Democratic caucus Thursday afternoon selected John A. Perez (pictured) as assembly speaker, putting him in line to become the first openly gay person to hold such a post, in California or any other U.S. state.
Perez, a freshman lawmaker from Los Angeles, said it was “an incredibly moving experience to have the unanimous support of my colleagues,” the Los Angeles Times reported.
There still needs to be a formal vote by the full assembly; that has yet to be scheduled, according to the Times. A timetable for his replacement of incumbent speaker Karen Bass also has yet to be set. Bass helped garner support for Perez, whose chief opponent for the speaker’s post was fellow Los Angeles assemblyman Kevin De Leon.
Perez, a cousin of Los Angeles mayor Antonio Villaraigosa, has served in the assembly just one year. He could potentially serve five years as speaker, one of the longest terms possible, as assembly members are term-limited at six years.
Rick Jacobs, chair of the California political group Courage Campaign, issued a statement calling Perez “a true progressive who will lead our state during the worst economic crisis since the Great Depression.” Jacobs continued, “We’re proud that he’s the first openly gay leader of a legislature in U.S. history and we’re looking forward to working closely with Assemblymember Perez to help build a more progressive California.”
The Rockwall Young Democrats have just won the “Ally Group of the Year” award from the Stonewall Democrats of Dallas.
Stonewall Democrats of Dallas is an organization of politically active individuals working for the gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender community in Dallas and Texas.
Stonewall president Erin Moore said the Rockwall Young Democrats have been consistent in their support during the Pride Parade, Lifewalk and any other event or meeting.
“They usually volunteer and are very active and energetic,” she said.
We’re tying to learn more from Rockwall Young Democrats’ president Phil Borawski.
Let me be clear: I did not, initially, intend to have a blog that had anything to do with the fact that I am a lesbian. After all, my lesbian perspective is woven throughout the fabric of me, all the many other aspects of me, and ALL of whom rebel against any categorization or pigeon hole that anyone might want to stuff me into.
Lesbian in a box.
I can see the indexing, taxonomy issues now….is a lesbian a sub-category of sexuality, under homosexuality, or is it a sub category of female, woman, same-sex love? Or is it a first-order category unto itself? Is it an issue of gender, sex, environment, culture, politics, biology, stress in the womb, the size of a pinky finger? How many earnest gender-politico-sexual university courses can be wrung, strung out of everything lesbian?
You would not pick me out as a lesbian. Not by my house, not by my clothes, not by my car, my library, my dog, my speech pattern. If you saw me, you’d register female first, some wild guess about ethnicity –in which you would always be wrong–some wild guess about age, and you’d be wrong about that too.
I am invisible as a lesbian. Except for when I’m not.
Living in the largest city in Canada affords me a certain freedom that many other lesbians don’t have even in North America. I can walk down the street holding hands with a woman if I choose to, and sometimes I do.
Other times, I wear little buttons, only noticeable if you really look and I will wear them going to Holt’s or out and about the city to shop or walk around: the little button that says, “I prefer girls” or the one that has two stick girls on it with the names, “Eve + Eve”. Watching people read the button and the dawn of recognition and the looking they try not to do, I am sorry to say, amuses me. Catching people as they grapple with their habit of stereotyping is my teeny, tiny seditious political act.
When I think about being visibly lesbian, apart from the obvious of rainbow flags on everything and T-shirt declarations and girls hanging off each other, my default starting point? It’s all about the hair. After all, hair is political and something we immediately notice and use to slot each other into those categories we hold in our mind.
I’m convinced that in hair stylist school, there is that catalogue of easy-to-care for dyke haircuts, #1 – 8 around the Western world, and Philippines, and each year some little cabal sits around debating the styles to reach consensus for the community. My hair style is not in that catalogue.
Other indicators? Me and my crew look to eyeglasses. Or shoes. Cool women, with an edge. Noticeable if you can see.
Sometimes people know that there’s something going on, but don’t know what they know.
Like the time my nephew was trying to figure out what it was that was going on between me and a woman I had introduced him to. She and I had just started to see each other. My nephew, always happy to see me, eyed this woman carefully. He was quieter than usual. I gave him his time.
Then he came over to the couch, and climbed up on me, throwing his arms around me neck, his eyebrows knitted together as he searched for words to describe what he was feeling and blurted out, “You….. you….. you two smell like carrots!”
I wanted to laugh: he was clearly trying to figure out this sense of togetherness we had this woman and me, this feeling between us, and could not find the words.
“Yes we do,” I said. The three of us hugged and he was content with the answer.
Or another time, at the butcher shop with a woman I was seeing who’s hair colour and height was similar to my own. We were choosing items for dinner. The butcher looked us over and smiled.
“Sisters?” he asked.
The woman with me looked at me wondering, I suppose, if the guy used his eyes to see and how I would respond. I smiled at her.
Then I smiled at him. “No,” I said, adding, “closer than that.”
He looked a bit puzzled. ”Twins?” he asked.
I smiled as he handed me the package of meat, raising my right eyebrow slightly, and said, “Nope. Closer than that.”
I linked my arm through hers, leaving him with his eyebrows knitted together trying to figure it out.
Those are little acts. Not as good as some of the comedy that’s out there. Some of us are funny lesbians. Always welcome if we make people laugh. Slip our “see, we’re just like you!” into the stories of babies, and diapers and parents. (Do NOT get me started on the night I went to see a batch of lesbian comedians and to a one, their comedy was about babies and mothering.)
The bigger acts are about addressing antiquated, discriminatory laws. And that’s important.
And yet, when I think about this equality in the eyes of the law I am not sure which gets my dander up more: equality as a woman, or as a lesbian, because let’s face it, there is still discrimination against women: we still make 71 cents for every dollar that men make (in Canada); we are NOT represented in the power brokering, decision-making systems in the world and we remain economically, politically, judicially, educationally and sexually disadvantaged the world over. And yes, amongst those women the world over, lesbians are in that mix.
And I wonder if things get better for women, does that translate into being better for lesbians? I want to say yes, but there are mad voices out there, shrill, unreasonable and hateful.
And it is at this point that I realize that my lesbian self does have a perspective, thoughts and stories, a bit of prose, and of course some poems, because what lesbian doesn’t read lesbian poetry?? That’s what I’ll be writing about once or twice a week.
You read that right. The California legislature recently approved a plan put forth by PG&E to purchase power from an orbiting solar panel satellite that will transmit the power back to Earth via radio transmittable energy.
From the article:
Solaren anticipates that their panels will generate 1,700 gigawatt-hours of energy per year (roughly equal to the annual consumption of 250,000 average homes) throughout the 15-year contract term made with PG&E. While an experimental project such as this seems far flung for California’s Renewables Portfolio Standard program, the agreement was approved because it remains consistent with the state’s objective of increasing its reliance on a diverse supply of renewable energy resources and of supporting renewable technologies. It should be noted that there will be no risk to PG&E, and in turn California customers, as the company is simply agreeing to purchase the power at a certain rate, if and when the project is ever up and running.
Ever hear of Diane Savino? You will. Currently, our senator from Staten Island, she recently made the nation’s radar with her speech on the sanctity of marriage, well worth viewing here:
“Diane Savino has dedicated her entire professional career towards improving the lives of working families. She began her career in public service as a caseworker for New York City’s Child Welfare Administration, providing direct assistance to abused and neglected children. …
As a labor activist, she actively and successfully campaigned for an increase in the minimum wage from $5.15 to $7.15—the first raise for New Yorkers in over a decade. …
Senator Savino has passed important legislation, including a law that ended the 5-year statute of limitation on sexual assualt, a bill establishing a task force for the prevention and treatment of cervical cancer, the Olive Oil Labeling Bill, which prohibits additives in virgin olive oil, the Prompt Pay Bill, which ensures prompt payment to construction contractors and their employees, a cost-of-living increase in the death benefit for widows and widowers of police officers and fire fighters killed in the line of duty.
In addition, Senator Savino has championed legislation protecting hard-working New Yorkers, Paid Family Leave, which establishes up to 12 weeks of paid leave to care for a sick family member or newborn, Domestic Workers Bill of Rights, expanding basic worker protection rights to domestic workers, and a law that would limit public authorities from contracting out for services that can be performed by public employees.”
From her recent speech to the New York State Senate:
“Turn on the television. We have a wedding channel on cable TV devoted to the behavior of people on the way to the altar. They spend billions of dollars, behave in the most appalling way, all in an effort to be princess for a day. You don’t have cable television? Put on network TV. We’re giving away husbands on a game show. You can watch The Bachelor, where thirty desperate women will compete to marry a 40-year-old man who has never been able to maintain a decent relationship in his life.”
“That’s what we’ve done to marriage in America, where young women are socialized from the time they’re five years old to think of being nothing but a bride. They plan every day what they’ll wear, how they’ll look, the invitations, the whole bit, they don’t spend five minutes thinking about what it means to be a wife. People stand up there before god and man even in Senator Diaz’s church, they swear to love honor and obey, they don’t mean a word of it. So if there’s anything wrong with the sanctity of marriage in America, it comes from those of us who have the privilege and the right and have abused it for decades.”
Interview with Senator Savino here!
You can e-mail her your thanks!
savino@senate.state.ny.us
Senator Diane J. Savino
512 Legislative Office Building
Albany, New York 12247
Phone: (518) 455-2437
Fax: (518) 426-6943
~~~
Carrying on the gay day: Meredith Baxter comes out (though she was never in)!
View all here:
Interview with Meredith Baxter at The Advocate (click here).
“…this is where I want to be because I was dead to the world in many other ways. I’ve been married three times, and I have a slew of children, but I’ve never felt that kind of connection before in that kind of awakening. It was very profound for me…
The message I get is that I’m America’s mom. And because research seems to show that people who have someone who is gay in their family — or a friend or just know someone in the community who is gay — they seem to have a more open attitude about gay and lesbian issues. So I can say I’m still that mom. I am still the same person. I’m nonthreatening, I’m very friendly, I’m accessible, and if they can say, ‘OK, well, she’s a lesbian, maybe that’s not such a scary thing. And if she can come out and say that without too much fear, then maybe I can do that.’If it makes a difference to a couple of people, then I guess it’s worthwhile. I certainly got tired of hiding to the extent that I was.
This is just a general thing going over some of the basics of coming out. I am going to give out the warning right now in no way is this suppose to be a complete guide or a know all beat all of how a coming out thing will go. If you are a little confused or something this is referring to coming out which is slang for when a queer people tell others that they are LGBTQ.
I would say that “Coming Out” is more like a process than a single thing. I think it first starts with you. There are so many ways that this can happen. However you went about finding out that you are LGBTQ. When you find yourself being different from the “norm” you generally can pick one of two choices ( There are many more because humans are all different). A) You can reject the feelings that you have and try to fit the “norm”. B) You accept who you are.
Now that you have accepted who you are. There is still one thing that is in your way no one knows. So your next step after you are good and comfortable with yourself. You now have to make the really really big step and I would suggest that you don’t go diving into this. I would suggest try picking someone who is
A) LGBTQ
B) A really really good friend who you have at least a good feeling will accept you
C) Tell the person who has been saying that you are LGBTQ for the longest time.
D) which is Tell you ex-girlfriend that you left on really good terms with
E) Your parents
They will most likely support you (I Choose C and D) which is Tell you ex-girlfriend that you left on really good terms with).
Once you tell them you can move on to your parents which, is a big step. If you didn’t tell them first which you can defiantly do. This is assuming that you didn’t. This can be one of the most scariest parts of coming out because of the really close relationship that you have with your parents. I would suggest bringing it up with the one parent that you feel the closest to. If your family is extremely homophobic or you feel that they would not accept you I would strongly suggest that you get a support group out side of your home to support you through this step. I also think that you should tell your parents and give them the respect of knowing that your trust them. Not to say that everything is going to be fine or even comfortable for a while it maybe arguing as they digest what you have told them. They may take it really badly. I would give them time and also show them that this is who you are. As well as showing them that you are happy and feel safe being LGBTQ. If you can I would try to get some of your LGBTQ friends to come over and hangout and try to invite your parents into at least a little bit of your social life.
Here is the summary of “coming out” After the above mentioned steps you will always be “coming out”. To people you meet to finding new ways of expressing yourself to people. There will never be a time where you are done “coming out” you will always have to answer the Why’s, How’d you know and all the other questions that come up. So I guess this is about all I can think of for “Coming Out” Guide thing so I hope you like it. So let the “coming out” continue down its own weird path.
TRUE UNCLE SAM OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA - SAMUEL DANIEL LOVELESS S.D.L. PUREENERGY312
ALLOW ME TO BE CLEAR:
I WILL NOT GO BACK INTO THE DARKNESS
I AM NOT CRAZY
I JUST LOVE AND CARE FOR ALL OF US SO MUCH THAT I MUST DO WHATEVER IT TAKES.
TRUE LEADERSHIP REQUIRES IT.
BIT BY BIT BY BIT
STONE BY STONE BY STONE
BRICK BY BRICK BY BRICK
WE REBUILD
PUREENERGY312
SAMUEL DANIEL LOVELESS
S.D.L.
PLAYING MY TRUE ROLE
TRUE UNCLE SAM OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA
I KNOW AS A FACT THAT YOU ARE ALL PULLING FOR US AS A UNIT.
LET IT FLOW
LET’S ROLL
THANK YOU
and all my sentences got slashed with her cold eyes kitchen shears
I said “That’s not it,” I said “It’s just,”
and then I put my clothes on
and then she turned the lights on
and then the door opened and I left
Monday night
we were lying like spoons in a drawer
I toyed with her dark hair and whispered things
we stayed like that for awhile before she
hid her face from me making a mask with her little hands
when I pulled them back her lashes were all wet
“Promise me you won’t hurt me like she did.”
(it’s times like these I look to the tree I pluck all my pretty words from who’s branches normally break from the vernacular strain, but at times like these it shivers naked winter twigs and I’m left digging through fallen fruit on the frozen ground.)
“She made me think I’m a bad person, am I a bad person?”
I’ve checked for an official Meredith website and was unable to find one so thought I’d leave a little note for her here. Will she read it? Most likely not.
I felt every jitter of nerves you were probably feeling, Meredith, during your announcement on the Today Show this morning. I know how hard it is to say those words out loud. I’m sure your palms were sweating and your knees shaking. I’ll bet you had second, third, and 1,000th thoughts right up until the camera turned to you. Internal and external debates aside, Meredith, you executed fantastically, with grace and style. I thought you were tremendously brave.
It is one thing to come out to yourself. Another to your children. And to your family. But to make an announcement like that to the world…that takes sheer guts (and a nearby bathroom).
Matt Lauer. Well, I was impressed. I can say with heartfelt gratitude that it was not Ann Curry doing the interview. I couldn’t have stomached the false intensity of the contrived ‘lean forward, rest your hand on the guest’s knee, gaze deeply into her eyes, lower your voice, and ask…”how does it feel?”‘ Nope. That would have sucked. Matt was great.
The interview, if you missed it, can be found on YouTube here.
For those who will read this and start the usual whinge of “nobody ever comes out with, ‘I’m straight’” news…suck it up. Nobody has to come out as straight, it’s an assumed norm, with anything else being perceived as the “other,” with the ‘other’ being connotatively construed as wrong. (If any of those words confused you, look them up.). As Meredith said in her interview, she was putting a personal face on the issue. This is a woman who represented a generation to many of us, and iconic ideal. If she can be a lesbian an loved, why can’t we all?
I went to a Hallowe’en party this year and met Alice’s Queen of Hearts. Fabulous costume designed and made by the wearer, also a wonderful (male) fourth grade teacher. You’re kidding yourself if you don’t think we’re teaching your kids in the grade and high schools/colleges/universities. Are we recruiting? Absolutely not. Are we everywhere? You bet your ass we are. Don’t like it? Tough. Live with it.
If you don’t like lesbians, don’t sleep with one. Same goes for gay men. If you don’t like gay marriage, don’t marry a gay person.
What you did today Meredith was well done, indeed. Thank you.
don’t care about you and your husband having your bi-monthly missionary sex, that’s your business. Frankly,truestory. I’m just happy you’re gettin’ some. Why can’t you be happy for me too?
